Monday, June 04, 2007

Ayelet the sex therapist

So I made the mistake of telling somebody that I was taking Human Sexuality this summer. And that person told a friend, and that friend decided that since 1) I have a degree in psychology and 2) I am officially studying sex, she could ask me a question about a very intimate matter. Something to do with her husband, to whom she's been married for about two years.

I was hesitant. I'm still not a licensed therapist, and while I know a fair amount about sex, through reading and experience, I wasn't sure I would be able to help her. But I told somebody that her friend could call me and I'd do my best.

"Hi, um, is this, um, Ayelet?" Shy, halting, very quiet breathy voice. Kind of like Marilyn Monroe via Bais Yaakov.

"Yes, is this somebody's friend with the question?"

"Oh wow, how'd you know?"

"Lucky guess," I said.

"So, like, it's about my husband. He told me something, and I don't know what to make of it."

Uh-oh. Please don't let it be something really perverted.

"What did he say?" I asked calmly. Trying to sound like people always call me with bizarre sex questions, and I have all the answers.

"He likes to look at women's feet." She coughed delicately. "It makes him... he... he really likes it."

Hallelujah! As fetishes go, feet are pretty innocuous.

"There's really only one thing you need to do," I told her. "Get a pedicure with red nail polish. Maybe some cute strappy stiletto sandals. And then... well, you'll probably get anything you want from him."

"So he's not... sick?" she asked anxiously.

"No. Foot fetishes are no big deal psychologically."

"Why do men get all excited about smelly feet?" she asked.

"Men are very visual," I said, "and sometimes they form associations between what they see and the excitement they're feeling. Then seeing that again gets them excited again."

"Interesting," she said. But she got the pedicure, and later left me a voicemail saying that it was as if she'd given him a bottle of Viagra.

Another small score for therapist Ayelet.
Copyright (c) 2007 "Ayelet Survivor"

3 comments:

  1. I like feet myself, though I wouldn't go as far as to say I have a fetish. I can certainly appreciate feet with done-up toes, in a pair of strappy heels, and an anklet and/or toe ring...

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  2. I personally never understood the fetish from a sexual standpoint, and I'm not so keen on the wording "Why do men get all excited about smelly feet?", as if to suggest all men share her husband's views on the matter...

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  3. Young Shlomo, PLENTY of men are into feet. Actually, Detroit Guy is into feet. One of the things that scared me off about him was how he kept telling me how he'd take care of me if we were together, including rubbing my feet. Then, I guess he has a full disclosure policy, he intimated that there was something in it for him.

    I like having my feet rubbed, but Detroit Guy has just been trying way too hard, which sends up all kinds of red flags.

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