Saturday, August 25, 2007

Okay, so I HAD to get in just ONE more post...

"That won't fit you," said Jerusha, as I took her "skinny skirt" out of the closet. Whenever I bring Shabbos clothes to the suburbs we never go to shul, and since we're going straight to the Catskills tomorrow, I tried to pack light and only brought casual clothing.

But Jerusha had forgotten I was coming for Shabbat, even though we discussed it on Tuesday, and had accepted a lunch invitation, which was gracefully extended to me, last-minute, by the hostess. (In the spirit of Elul and dan kaf l'zchut, I should mention it was a hectic week; she went away for a few days with my brother-in-law to celebrate their 15th anniversary, is supervising extensive reconstruction and redecorating of her home, and was planning for our time in the Catskills.)

I put on my nicest knit top and Jerusha said, "Too casual," although she wore a knit top as well. I asked if I could borrow something, and she grudgingly agreed. "I feel like you never bring enough clothes when you come and you always end up borrowing mine," she groused. (Some sisters actually enjoy sharing clothes. Not in this house.)

"I feel like whenever I bring nice clothes we don't go to shul, and I shlep them in on a long subway and bus ride for no reason," I rejoindered, taking the "skinny skirt" off the hanger. "You're right," I said, zipping it and dropping it loosely onto my hips. "It doesn't fit -- it's too big." I'm too small for an Ann Taylor 12!!!! I rummaged around for another skirt and top.

"Don't ruin that skirt," she warned balefully; it's one of her favorites, even though odds are she'll never squeeze into it again. "I won't," I snapped, "I'm not wearing it; I'm borrowing something else." The green silk blouse that revealed too much of her ample cleavage was positively Borough Park tznius on less ample me. Green's not my color, but I wore it anyway.

"Ayelet, I remember you -- you're the PR girl!" said the host when I walked into his living room.

I haven't worked in PR for more than a decade. It was a little disconcerting; I was amazed he remembered me, although granted, not many frum girls work in public relations. I vaguely remembered meeting him and his then-fiancée. He and I had several mutual friends who used to host many Shabbos meals on the Upper West Side. Now all of them, including him, are living in the suburbs with two, three, four kids.

I wasn't oppressed by too much husband-bashing, although in this setting at least a little is inevitable. I just wish married people would be just a little more sensitive around single people. They have houses, spouses, kids, cars -- stop complaining and start appreciating! A good friend of mine reminded me that shalom bayis brings moshiach, and these kvetches are definitely not doing their share.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

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