Tuesday, August 14, 2007

What do men want?

I must have too much time on my hands, or too many troubles on my mind. I don't normally post four times in one day, but right now I'm completely fed up with men.

I've been corresponding on a dating website with one guy. He doesn't answer my last email. Then I see him cruising the site later. Obviously looking for someone else. Another guy and I spoke on the phone for almost an hour on Sunday -- he said he'd call Monday or Tuesday. He hasn't.

However, I have heard from some truly bizarre creatures. One sent me the awful chrain in Spain joke and said "I hope you liked my joke and my profile." Um, you're older than I said I was interested in, you didn't go to college, you have a really weak sense of humor, and you're chassidic -- yet on my profile it says, "I am not chassidic and not looking to become chassidic." In what bizarro-world universe would I be interested in you?

I just wrote about Sparky, the over-sharing IT geek. And seconds ago I got a note from a really angry young man:

I used to be chassidish, now I'm apparently just angry. I wish I could find a woman who could calm the anger. I know I could make that woman very happy. I don't think I care very much now for a woman who'll cover her hair at all. If it's beautiful show it. If you look good in a pair of pants I would think you should wear them. That would be most women just NOT Hillary Clinton. She would look best in a burka!

This is from his profile:

I grew up in a yeshivish black hat home. Approximately ten years ago I became chassidish. I truly felt that I'd find my niche there but for some reason although they treat me wonderfully I'm not good enough to marry them. The "yeshivishe" community doesn't want me because I don't have the right look. Do I really have to wear a 200 dollar borsalino to be good enough? Open your eyes! The best litvishe boys obviously don't want you! Don't you read the Yated? Look closely at yourself. If you're looking online for the best in the whole of Lakewood you must be crazy and I wouldn't want you either. I ranted enough already. For all of these reasons I'm not quite sure where I belong.

I'm looking for a warm and loving gentle woman who won't judge me by who I look like but rather by who I am. I password protected my photos because I was being overlooked by the most openminded women on the web. I've already learned the hard way to never judge a person you don't know by outside appearances.

In other words, "Bitter -- party of one." I responded:

You're obviously very angry, which is clear both from your note to me and your profile, and I have to say -- it's not an attractive quality. You need to temper that anger before you'll be able to attract a woman who will want to spend more than 30 seconds in your company. I strongly suggest you seek therapy.

By the way -- I'm a registered Democrat, so gratuitous Hillary-bashing really doesn't turn me on.

Why do these guys keep bothering me? Obviously my freak flag is flying, drawing in the weirdos and scaring off the normal guys. What am I doing wrong?

Then again, maybe it's the guys on this website that are damaged, not me. I just read this gem in someone's profile:

This is what I am looking for in a mate: beautiful physically -- but a better person with an incredible heart; driven and ambitious -- but more interested in building a family than a career.

Does such a woman even exist?
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

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