Thursday, October 18, 2007

I love it when I'm right

My good friend Celeste confirmed my (and Jerry's) suspicions. I cc'd her on my response to Prof. Worried and the deans, and she wrote me:

It actually wasn’t clear that you were acting. After you left, a few people wondered whether you were or weren’t. One person thought that you weren’t, but said if you were, the class didn’t handle it well, and hoped that it would’ve handled it better. Another person was very certain that you were, and talked about how it was very important for our prof to be in that class. She said that whenever a mindfulness session is led, the facilitator must be very well trained. In general, we can’t assume that just because we’re doing something in the classroom, somebody might not have a reaction to it.

[Note to my readers: Utter poppycock. People don't just dissociate because they're doing mindfulness exercises.]

That sounds like a very good substance abuse treatment class you had. Great experience! The kind of thing that would really help with your education.

[Celeste, like many of us, is frustrated by the lack of actual clinical training we're getting in our clinical practice class. It's clear the teacher is a seasoned clinician, but she tends to tell rather than show. Which doesn't really give you therapeutic chops, so to speak.]

I knew Celeste's natural delicacy would make her reluctant to name names, but I begged:

Please tell me who was "very certain."

I am going to make a public service announcement next class, to let people know I was ACTING. Honestly -- if I hadn't been, how would I have recovered so soon? People don't just dissociate one minute and then calm right down.

She caved:

Norma was quite certain. She said she’d had some experience while facilitating some sessions, and she said that you had a definite look about you. I didn’t actually notice a look. It seemed that she was the only one who fully felt that you weren’t acting. However, that’s probably a good idea to discuss that in class next week.

[A little knowledge can be a very dangerous thing. Or, as in Norma's case, a strong propensity to believe in your own omniscience.]

Perhaps when you said you were exaggerating, it may have seemed that you did slightly (?) dissociate but were able to recover quickly. I think maybe 4 or 5 of us were still in the room while this discussion was happening. It was clear to me that none of us really knew what dissociation really looks like. I’d like to know. I’ve never actually seen someone dissociate.

Let's make snake bites out of lemons:

I knew it! (So did Jerry.) Norma is such an idiot. Next week I will apologize and maybe ask the prof to talk a little bit about what real dissociation looks like. And I'll apologize, and say that I don't have borderline personality disorder -- I only suffer from a narcissistic desire to control class discussion, and I will seek help for it.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

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