Sunday, March 30, 2008

Don't ask, don't tell?

A Jewish woman who has sexual relations with a non-Jew, also known as an "isha zona" or "whore," is proscribed from marrying a Cohen, a member of the priestly caste. When the Temple was standing in Jerusalem, a Cohen offered up sacrifices and had many other duties. Today, a Cohen's primary responsibilities are to bless the congregation during certain holidays and to be called first for aliyot or to lead benching. It's basically a symbolic honor.

And it's a whole class of guys I can't date -- during my manic days, I slept with more than one non-Jew. Even some who weren't circumcised, which is especially bad. I've come to my senses, of course, and I don't do this anymore, but it's too late.

Or is it? I've heard some opinions that a woman who is an isha zona should just not tell Cohanim about her status, and date and marry him anyway. I'm too embarrassed to ask my rabbi, but I'm wondering if I should start making inquiries through other channels. It didn't work for the U.S. armed forces, but could "don't ask, don't tell" help me find a husband?
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

1 comment:

  1. I know someone who was in your situation and met and ended up marrying a Cohain. They managed to find some kind of heter, though I don't know the details. I know it might be difficult, but it might be worth it to find out your options.