Monday, March 31, 2008

Smelling my way out of a bad mood

I was in a terrible mood all day. Angry, angry, angry. After being stood up last night, I was fried.

I don't think it affected my professional demeanor or performance. I was completely there for my clients, dealt with a few crises in Melanie's absence, co-facilitated a group, and had an individual therapy session with a client who's even angrier than I am, probably with better reason.

I even managed to crack a few jokes with two of my co-workers about how my hair, and my booty, aren't really "white-girl" hair and booty. One's Latina, one's African-American, and the three of us struggle with weight and frizz (Melanie and Sally are skinny; Julie's tall and slender; the male social workers and psychiatrist are average-weight to skinny). Hey sista, go sista, soul sista....

But my anger lurked beneath the surface and emerged as soon as I left the office. I fumed the whole train ride home. I also had to wait at the pharmacy for more than half an hour because of course I forgot to drop off my prescriptions this morning. Some stupid 10-year-old girl kept playing a tinkly, repetitive melody on an electronic device. I kept glaring at her like I wanted to swat her across the store.

Anyway, I got home, angry and exhausted, to an order I placed during one of my 3 a.m. vigils. I had decided to try a natural approach to boost my mood and ordered some aromatherapy essential oils. Thought I ordered geranium and rose, ended up with jasmine and rose. No matter; all three are supposed to lift depression. So I dropped some in my diffuser and am waiting to feel less furious.

But probably tonight was not the best night to have organic frozen chili for dinner, though. Right now all I smell are beans, onions, and tomato. I'll have to have something blander for dinner tomorrow.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

No comments:

Post a Comment