Saturday, February 07, 2009

Ignoring men doesn't seem to work, either

According to The Rules, you shouldn't chase a man. You should make him chase you. Therefore, you shouldn't show too much interest. Ignore him and he will be intrigued, and pursue you.

I must be doing something wrong. I tried the ignore strategy on two men, and neither of them has chased me.

First up was Another Facebook Guy. On Wednesday night I saw a mouse in my apartment. Very upsetting, especially since I don't want to have to trap and dispose of it myself. On Thursday, I posted a status update on Facebook:

Ayelet needs to borrow one of those things that get rid of mice. What are they called again? Oh yeah... MEN.

I'd seen AFG on Facebook a few times but had diligently refrained from contacting him. Sure enough, he sent me an IM:


I was confused and replied:

? needing a man to get rid of the mouse?

He responded:

I had an IM screen up - not sure why - and I saw your status, which I thought was cute - that's all

That's all? You mean you're not going to ask me out? Well, I should probably still play it cool, then.

thanks -- the mouse itself was not nearly as cute

Is he going to step up to the plate and volunteer to de-mouse my apartment? No, he's just going to give me an emoticon:


Sigh. Maybe if I show how much I need help with the mouse?

yeah, now I have to leave a note for the exterminator, since I'm going away for Shabbos

He can either commiserate, volunteer to help, or ask where I'm going. Any of those will start a conversation.

have a nice Shabbos... :)

Guess not.

I went to Brooklyn for Shabbos. AGAIN. My friend Miriam was making a big Shabbos lunch. And invited RD-SOB. I wasn't looking forward to seeing him, but figured it would be fun to get away from the west side, spend time with my Brooklyn friends and maybe make some new ones.

I'd met a guy two weeks ago, very briefly, but he seemed interested. I wasn't sure I was -- he's divorced with a kid, plus he's a Cohen, so I don't know if anything could ever happen (at a minimum I'd have to have a very embarrassing conversation with a rabbi). I decided to see if ignoring him at the Shabbos lunch would intrigue him and draw him to me.

It didn't. I greeted him when he came in, he responded... and that was it. He didn't try to sit near me, engage me in conversation, whatever. Ignoring him didn't awaken the hunter instinct, did not make him pursue me.

I probably should talk to Rochel about how to pique and keep a man's interest. I'm also consulting with Ziva Kramer later this month -- I'll let you know how that goes.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"


  1. I have to say that reading your blog certainly brings to light how the "other" side lives and what they are thinking about when it comes to relationships and the possabilities of them. Keep your chin up your beshert is right around the corner!

  2. Whatever happened with the mouse? (Ugh)

  3. @Yaakovsladder: thanks, and may H" send you your basherte very soon too.

    @Riva: exterminator's coming on Valentine's Day. Ironic, no? I won't have a valentine, but at least I won't have mice.