Sunday, August 14, 2011

"How do you NOT have a boyfriend, Ayelet?"

Liora asked me that last night. "You're beautiful, sexy, and smart!" she added. We were celebrating her birthday at a nice but loud Upper East Side bar. The music was awesome, and thanks to "Glee" I recognized most of it.

Liora looked adorable, and she was so sweet to compliment me like that. But I didn't have a good answer for her. Before I went to the party I sent out some positive energy to the universe, instructing the law of attraction to send me attractive men. Unfortunately, the universe didn't pay attention. The most attractive man there -- a convert named Lucas -- didn't really talk to me. First I tried speaking to him, but a large, aggressive woman came over and totally cock-blocked me. (I don't know the feminine equivalent.)

I walked away and complained to an acquaintance of mine, Tessie, who's also somewhat rotund. "Let's go over and talk to him," she suggested. I thought that was a great idea -- after all, I'm beautiful, sexy, and smart, and she... isn't. So we did -- and he started chatting with her. I guess she's just better at small talk. Disgruntled, I walked away after a few minutes to talk to my friend ET (who agreed with Liora that I looked beautiful that night). Tessie walked over to me in a bit.

"She did the same thing to me! Walked right over and started talking like I wasn't even there," she said. We sighed. "Do you know anyone else here?" she asked.

"I know that guy," I said, pointing, "but I don't like him." She thought that was hilarious.

Romantically, it was a disappointing night. But I learned a little more about Jacob da Syrian from Ikey Abadi, who was also there. Apparently Jacob is a rabbi and very nice, serious about getting married, average looking and not overly overweight. Promising, I suppose.

In other news, two of my emergency backup references came through and emailed recommendations to HR. So I start work on Monday.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

1 comment:

  1. The feminine equivalent of cock-block is twat-block. Actually heard someone use it in a recent movie!