Wednesday, November 30, 2011

A date with my crush

No, EG didn't ask me out. But I'm tired of crushing on him. How do you get over a crush? Well, in this day and age, you Google "how to get over a crush." I read several articles, and my favorite tip was to set aside time to think about the crush, and not think about him at any other time.

I like this tip because it's a behavioral intervention. As a clinical social worker, I impose interventions on my patients on a frequent basis. Maybe "impose" is the wrong word, since they're voluntary patients and not mandated. But I expect them to participate in CBT and to follow through with homework assignments I give them. I would be quite the hypocrite if I were unwilling to do the same thing.

So I'm limiting the time I spend thinking about EG. I will only think about him at night, when I'm in bed trying to fall asleep. (It's also conducive to another activity, in case I want to do a little more than just think.) I did this during another crush I had -- on a married man. Obviously nothing was ever going to happen between us, but he was luscious and powerful, and I craved him. So for a long time, that man was the last thing I thought about before I went to sleep. (Or did something else.)

And today, I no longer have a crush on him. I no longer think about him obsessively, all day/every day. He's a good friend, nothing more. Which suggests that limiting my EG-fantasy time to bedtime might just get me over EG.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

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