Friday, July 20, 2012

Blame it on the bladder infection

(Again, males and squeamish readers might not want to read this)

On the advice of my chiropractor, I bought a computer chair. After sitting in it all day the day before yesterday, I was in serious pain. I considered getting a footstool, but I think I'm going to have to return it. A day after pushing it aside, my glutes are still burning and my lower back aches. For a while, I couldn't tell if my knees hurt because my back hurt so much.

Yesterday I went for my cystoscopy. I forgot to mention my bladder in the list of body parts that have disappointed me. While on leave, I decided to address my ongoing UTI problem. But I've been annoyed with this urology practice from the start. At my first appointment (which I made to see Dr. A and was told upon sign-in I'd see Dr. B), I waited two hours to see Dr. C, who prescribed Keflex. He said I needed a sonogram and a cystoscopy, so at the reception desk I scheduled an appointment for a sonogram.

"Do I get it here or at another site?" I asked.

"You can get it here," she said. The employees run the place with the cheerful efficiency of the DMV. Nobody seemed happy to be working there; nobody was friendly; nobody smiled. And I came down with bronchitis two days later -- possibly because I was sitting in a waiting room with sick people for two hours.

Two weeks later, I arrived for my sonogram.

"You can't get that here," said the receptionist. "Your insurance won't cover in-office procedures."

"But I asked that when I made the appointment!" I said. She wasn't budging. "Ma'am, I'm just an employee," she said. Sure. Like the one who said I could have my sonogram there. I threw a mini-diva fit and insisted on speaking to a doctor. He got me an appointment that morning a few blocks away. The results weren't abnormal (although the tech was impressed by my extensive fibroid growth).

So, my cystoscopy. I arrived on time and they gave me a shot of Valium. After which the doctor came in and said, "Don't worry, it's no big deal -- it's easier than a pap smear."

Couldn't you have told me that before I was sedated? I have to say, though, that either it was over very quickly or Valium -- like all benzos, "Milk of Amnesia" -- made it seem like two seconds.

(When I had my first gingival graft, my dentist asked if I wanted Valium. "Sure," I said. "Five or 10 mg?" he asked. More is better, right? I opted for 10. I lay down in the chair, he bent over me, and then I was standing next to the reception desk, swaying a bit.

"Next procedure, you're only getting 5 mg," said my dentist sternly.)

Upshot: my bladder is severely inflamed, and I have to take antibiotics for a month. Strong antibiotics: Bactrim for a week and Macrobid for a month. Which are making me very nauseated. I wasn't sure if they were giving me a headache, but I developed one a few hours after taking my first Bactrim horse pill. Of course, that could be because I came home, wolfed down some food (no breakfast before a cystoscopy), and took a 4-hour nap.

Then off for two sonograms to check on my fibroids. Which are as much fun as you'd expect. For the transabdominal, you have to drink 4 glasses of water and wait an hour. With my sensitive bladder, I cheated and only drank 3. Fortunately, that was enough. Then after voiding, I had to endure the transvaginal. There was a lot of blood on the probe after she removed it, and my last period was 2 weeks ago. I think it's from the bladder infection, but I'm not 100% sure. I'm seeing my doctor on Monday, to go over more paperwork, so I will let him know. It might just be my body flushing out the bacteria.

Sorry if that is TMI.

Rounding out the day, I had a mammogram, which was so painful that I cried. My head was pounding, my back ached, my stomach was in nauseated knots. When I got home I didn't want to talk to anyone, which is why people kept calling and IMing me. (Why doesn't that happen when I'm feeling lonely?)

Right now my back still hurts, but the nausea is better. So hopefully I'm getting used to the Bactrim. I also started taking a probiotic supplement. And tonight I go for my first hypnosis session.

Why is it so painful being me? I'm trying not to be anxious about the job situation, but my savings are dwindling. And I can't go back to that commute. It almost killed me. I'm very frustrated and apprehensive. At my last job, I made a number of mistakes and pissed people off. At this job, I didn't. It feels like even when I do all the right things, I still get the shit kicked out of me by the universe.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

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