Saturday, May 23, 2015

A homely man with VERY high standards

Recently, a man in one of my Facebook singles groups posted an update asking if any women in the tri-state area would be interested in meeting a guy who has a good job and a nice house. I should have known that such a generic appeal would only come an unappealing prospect, but I commented and we emailed and exchanged phone numbers.

After a few days of aimless texting ("How are you?" "I'm at the pool having lunch" "How far are you from Penn Station?") he texted me on Saturday night:

What r u doing tonight I'm home relaxing. What r u doing tom

I responded

Going out with friends tonight, busy tomorrow

Not entirely true; I didn't have Saturday night plans. But I wasn't going to meet up with him last-minute. That looks desperate.

Let me know when we can talk and get together

he asked. I wrote back:

Let's talk tomorrow evening and make plans :)

The next day he texted

How are you.

I said,

Good Tired. But it was a productive day. How are you?

We exchanged a few more words, then he texted me Monday morning:

Gm. I'm at work. Let's talk later

I didn't want to chat with him while I was at work.

Okay. I should be home by 6:00 or so

He didn't like that.

I have my gym class at 6

It's not a big deal...

Call me after

I responded. He didn't. He texted me:

Do u have a pic or 2

and then texted me a picture of himself at the gym in a muscle T. Decent body, homely face. Well, it's the heart that counts, right? I sent him a selfie-- more or less a headshot.

Pretty. Do u have a length pic.

I didn't respond to that. All day. He texted me that evening:

Going to the gym. I'm glad mon is over

I indicated I was as well.

I didn't get a length pic

Wanted to text "And you won't," but there's no need to be hostile, so I filibustered.

I don't have any

He's a problem-solver:

Just take one phones have cams I took one for u

As though we had agreed to do this. I sidestepped again.

I didn't ask you to take one, and I'm not good at long selfies

Seriously, dude -- if I'm willing to meet you with that face, you shouldn't be super picky.

Take a half selfie. I have no idea how tall u are or your body t ype. I came prepared.

And I'm prepared to stop texting with you.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

Friday, May 22, 2015

Her not so perfect life

I had two friends who fell madly in love, were engaged in six weeks, got married young (24 & 25), had 3 kids, moved to the suburbs, bought a house, and had a perfect life.

After I read her joyous post about the gorgeous 15th anniversary gift he got her--a diamond eternity ring--I stopped following them on Facebook.

A few days ago, I saw his profile picture somewhere -- he joined a group or liked something. He was canoodling with a woman who was very definitely not his wife. I went to his page and learned that he had left her and their kids for a woman he met on vacation in the Dominican Republic. (He's no longer Orthodox, btdubs.)

I feel ashamed. I let my petty envy overshadow how kind she was to me. How much she loved me. How happy she was when I called her out of the blue and then friended her on Facebook years ago.

Recent pictures of her on Facebook show her smiling. I can't imagine the pain behind her smile. I might call her again one of these days.

(I know my brother-in-law did essentially the same thing, but my friend is sweet and beautiful, and my sister is a butt-ugly bitch.)
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"

Wednesday, May 06, 2015

Good for your brain, your heart, and your lady parts

For a while I was taking a probiotic supplement from ReNew Life called, very bluntly, "Ultimate Flora Vaginal Support." I tend to get a lot of UTIs, and I thought the supplements might stop that from happening.

After many UTI-free months, I stopped taking the supplements. Lately, I've been cranky and sad. I thought it was just work getting to me or the lack of a romantic life. But then I read about an interesting study that examined the impact of a multispecies probiotic on mood:

Compared to participants who received the placebo intervention, participants who received the 4-week multispecies probiotics intervention showed a significantly reduced overall cognitive reactivity to sad mood, which was largely accounted for by reduced rumination and aggressive thoughts.

That's the stuff.

I started looking for a probiotic supplement that contained all of the bacteria included in the study. And lo and behold, I found that all of them are in... the "Vaginal Support" supplement I used to take.

There's no guarantee that taking this supplement will improve my mood and functioning. But it's difficult to see how it will make things worse. There's also evidence that probiotics have a beneficial impact on blood pressure and serum cholesterol. While my blood pressure is low, my cholesterol is high and has been for quite some time, even though my diet is moderately low in cholesterol.

I think it's the stress and unhappiness increasing my cholesterol levels: cortisol thickens your blood in fight-or-flight mode so that you'll bleed less if you're wounded. Of course, my wounds are emotional, so the thicker blood is probably just building up the layers of plaque in my arteries. So if probiotics improve my mood, they might help lower my cholesterol.

So I'm adding probiotics back to my nightly medication cocktail, which also includes fish oil, vitamin D, and folic acid. Actually I'm out of folic acid, I better re-stock.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"