Tuesday, June 16, 2015

I could not be more wrong for this guy

Today on Jwed I got a message:

Hi, I like your pictures. I come to Manhattan once a week. Please view my picture. The password is [redacted.]

So I looked at his profile and his pictures. He's not physically unattractive, but he's definitely what they call "black velvet yarmulke," which translates to "too religious for Ayelet even when she used to keep Shabbos and kosher." And then there was this in his "About Me":

Caring, loving, kind, considerate, passionate, sensual, handy, Hoping to get married between Yom Kippur and Sukkot. It is a propitious time to marry according to the Holy books, especially for someone who has been divorced. It is a hectic time, yet very spiritual time. A moment when the soul is cleansed from the Atonement of Yom Kippur. Well, it's not a must, but a plus.

I'm not opposed to an autumn wedding, but I'm thinking more in terms of color scheme than cleanliness of soul, He lists his occupation as "Kollel & music." I do not want to be with someone who learns professionally; I can't afford to support that lifestyle, and I don't approve of it.

This is what he's looking for:

I don't have any specific restrictions. I would like to feel comfortable with my wife, and not have the need to converse at all times or else. I believe a husband and wife should feel naturally comfortable with each other, nevertheless I enjoy conversation, and a good laugh. 

Well, that's not too bad. After all, I like talking but I also like companionable silences.

I would like a wife that the bedroom is important to her. Once or twice a week is not what I need. I feel that husband and wife should be more open with each other in these matters and less shy.

We all know Ayelet would be happier with once or twice a day. Maybe we are compatible.

Another simple point is oral hygiene. When the moment for closeness comes, I feel for myself and my partner it should be obvious to be clean and have good breath, by brushing and taking mints. It seems kind of obvious, but the obvious at times is forgotten, due to its absolute, logical, and universal understanding. 

Is it really that difficult to establish the need for good oral hygiene? Oy. I'm starting to see why he's divorced.

Another thing, please ladies no major PMS issues, and please no Bipolar stuff. I'm trying to cut down on torture.

Well, that settles that. I'm trying to cut down on torture too, but I can't wish away the bipolar. So I wrote back telling him that we weren't a match. His response?

But I love u

Yeah, right. And people think I'm crazy. I was tempted to write, "Well, I have bipolar disorder and I'm offended by your profile" but I think it's best just to ignore his last message and block him if he gets annoying.
Copyright (c) "Ayelet Survivor"